ragginovel Chapter 20: Either Act or Get Out
Chapter 20: Either Act or Get Out
Lu Changgeng remained calm and unhurriedly took the cloth bag from Teng Sanniang's shoulder and placed it on the ground.
"Your Majesty, I am not borrowing for nothing; I have brought something that Your Majesty would like."
He opened the package, inside which were dozens of sets of exquisite clothing neatly folded. Although the fabric was ordinary material, the style of the clothing was something he had never seen before in Xiniu Hezhou.
The collection includes official robes with round necks and narrow sleeves, dragon robes with gold-embroidered dragon trim, twelve-tassel crowns, purple-gold court robes, imperial concubine skirts, and even a few sets of short clothes for street vendors, farmers, and fishermen.
Each piece was made with exquisite care, with fine stitches and neat patterns. It looked as if all the aspects of human life in the imperial court had been cut into a single package.
"Oh?"
The mandrill's gaze fell on the bright yellow dragon robe, its crimson eyes darting around. It then gestured for the little demon to present the package.
He used his two thick claws to lift the dragon robe, looked at the luminous pearl above his head from left to right, then picked up a crown and put it on his single horn to try it out, grinning: "This is quite novel."
Then he asked, "I've never seen these styles of clothing before?"
Lu Changgeng smiled slightly: "Your Majesty is a powerful ruler with many lesser demons under your command, and you are busy with countless affairs of state. Meanwhile, the human world is developing rapidly, so you are unaware of these new styles of clothing. I heard that the Great Sage enjoys gathering demons to play with in his spare time, so I thought I would bring Your Majesty the latest depictions of civil and military officials and people from all walks of life in the human world, so that you can dress up more realistically. Especially this one..." He pointed to the dragon robe, "...the king of a country. If Your Majesty is so pleased, you can ascend the throne and have some fun."
The mandrill squinted, examining the dragon robe again and again, then suddenly burst into laughter: "You're quite amusing, lad! This gift is excellent, it's right up my alley!"
He tossed the dragon robe aside, and the little demons immediately swarmed forward, carrying away the entire set of clothes.
He then casually picked up two more pieces of clothing, looked at them, and then tossed them aside.
"Borrowing magical artifacts and elixirs? Fine, I'm not being unreasonable." The mountain demon sat back on the tiger skin, one paw supporting his chin. "I do have a little gadget here that can be used during your tribulation, helping you withstand some heavenly lightning. As for elixirs..." He held up two fingers, "I still have two Demon Essence Pills and two Bone-Regenerating and Muscle-Regenerating Pills, enough to sustain you and help you regenerate muscles when you're injured during your tribulation."
Teng San Niang's face lit up with joy, and she was about to express her gratitude when the mountain demon raised his hand to interrupt her.
"But my magical artifacts and elixirs are not ordinary things. To be honest, your clothes are just for novelty and are not worth as much as those things."
Lu Changgeng's heart skipped a beat. This mandrill was indeed strange and not so easy to talk to. He would see what it had to say first.
"What else does Your Majesty require? I will do my utmost to fulfill it."
"Oh? That's good to hear...hehehe..."
The mandrill's gaze swept back and forth between Lu Changgeng and Teng Sanniang, a strange smile playing on its lips.
"The Taoist priest just presented me with a dragon robe and court attire, so he must know a little about the court rules in the mortal realm."
A sense of foreboding suddenly arose in Lu Changgeng's heart.
"This humble Taoist priest is not very talented, but he knows a little bit about this."
"I've been looking for something new to amuse myself lately. Since you two have come to me, why don't you put on a show for me?"
The mountain demon reached out and picked up the dragon robe, then took a piece of clothing from the little demon that he had just casually tossed aside, and threw both of them in front of Lu Changgeng and Teng Sanniang.
Lu Changgeng looked down and saw that what was thrown in front of him was none other than a long dress worn by a concubine, crimson and embroidered with gold, with delicate crystal beads adorning the neckline.
What was thrown in front of Teng San Niang was that bright yellow dragon robe.
Teng San Niang's face turned green on the spot; she had guessed what was going on.
"I want to see the emperor and his concubines." The mandrill slowly leaned back in its tiger skin, its paw casually tapping the armrest. "However, it has to be the other way around."
Suddenly, the stone hall fell silent.
The little demons looked at each other in bewilderment, then burst into laughter.
The wolf demon laughed so hard he almost fell over, the deer demon laughed so hard he almost bumped his antlers against the stone pillar, and several other small demons of unknown species lay on the ground pounding the stone slabs.
"Let Lady Iron Bone be the empress, and let this Taoist priest from Yangquan be... a concubine!" The wolf demon laughed until tears streamed down his face, "And he'll even have to serve her in bed!"
"Hahaha, serve the king! Serve the king! Your Majesty is truly wise!"
"What a beautiful concubine! Only her neck is a bit thick! And she has no breasts or buttocks!"
Teng San Niang's face changed from green to blue, and then from blue to white.
She subconsciously looked at Lu Changgeng, only to find that the Taoist of Yangquan remained expressionless, except for a slight twitch at the corner of his eye. The twitch was so quick that she would not have noticed it if she hadn't been looking closely.
Lu Changgeng was furious. "You made me dress up as a woman and perform for a monster to sleep with?"
If he becomes a saint, where will he put his face? Won't he be laughed at to death by the entire Three Realms?
But he remained outwardly calm, cupped his hands in greeting, and said in a flat tone, "Your Majesty, I am but a humble mountain dweller, crude and uncouth. How could I possibly play the role of a concubine? If I were to perform poorly, wouldn't that spoil Your Majesty's enjoyment? Perhaps..."
"No need for such modesty." The mountain demon waved his hand, interrupting him. "Lady Teng is quite beautiful; in a dragon robe, she would surely outshine the emperor. Although you, Daoist, are a water-based imposter, since you can conjure such a handsome human form, you would certainly look good in a concubine's gown." He paused, a hint of coldness in his voice. "What, Daoist, do you think my creation isn't worth your performance?"
The meaning is quite clear now.
You either have to act or you have to leave, but leaving might not be so easy.
Three more breaths passed, and those crimson eyes coldly stared at him: "Has the Daoist master made up his mind?"
Lu Changgeng remained silent for a few breaths, then suddenly let out a long sigh, as if he had made a difficult decision.
Lu Changgeng cupped his hands in a respectful gesture, his expression sincere: "Since Your Majesty has made this arrangement, I humbly accept. However…" He then changed the subject, a troubled look on his face, "Your Majesty is unaware that although I am a Taoist, I have heard some tales of human affairs. When mortal emperors favor their concubines, they are most particular about the atmosphere and ambiance. If this were to be hastily performed in this stone cave, it would lack a certain charm."
The mandrill raised an eyebrow: "Oh? Then what is your opinion, Taoist priest?"
Lu Changgeng remained calm and said slowly, "I have heard that emperors in the mortal world love to visit their concubines in hot springs. The steaming heat and the gurgling water, accompanied by the concubines undressing and bathing, is truly the greatest pleasure in the world."
Lu Changgeng glanced at Teng Sanniang, who understood and remained silent.
Lu Changgeng continued, "I have cultivated in Pansiling for many years. There is a spiritual spring in the ridge, nurtured by heaven and earth. The spring is steaming with hot air and the water is crystal clear, making it the perfect place. If I could perform this play for Your Majesty there, I would do my utmost to live up to Your Majesty's expectations. Since the weather is fine these days, why don't Your Majesty and I go together and perform it slowly?"
The mandrill narrowed its eyes, and the smile on its thunder god-like face slowly faded, replaced by a thoughtful expression.
He glanced at Lu Changgeng, then at Teng Sanniang, and then thought about his cultivation over the years and the hundreds of lesser demons in the cave. His bloodshot eyes darted around.
He suddenly turned his head and beckoned to a crow spirit beside him.
"Go to Pansiling, take a look from afar at what the spring looks like, and return quickly."